i get the following error while installing SS (the installer says the php mem is set to 32M, and phpinfo() tells me that memory_limit=32M. i even added the "ini_set(”memory_limit”,”32M”);"-line to main.php in the sapphire folder)

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Installing SilverStripe...

I am now running through the installation steps (this should take about 30 seconds)

If you receive a fatal error, refresh this page to continue the installation
# Creating 'mysite/_config.php'...
# Creating '.htaccess' file...
# Building database schema...

Fatal error: Allowed memory size of 33554432 bytes exhausted (tried to allocate 7680 bytes) in /var/www/htdocs/mysite/public/ss/sapphire/security/Member.php on line 354
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some setting i forgot maybe?

I think you've done nothing wrong but that in future versions we need to tackle the memory limit problem. As you would have noticed from the blog I write, we've been focused on new features. For the time being, increase the memory limit.