So after some brainfarts I decided to put on CMSMS to see what possible problems could be going on. CMSMS checks for a number of different things and resolving these issues fixed the problem.
My server was running apache in CGI mode as opposed to module so I had to change the settings in the php.ini file as such:
Change#1) upload_max_filesize = 2M to upload_max_filesize = 10M
Change#2) I had to created a "/tmp" folder in order to specify the "session.save_path = " as it was null
everything seems to be working now, login problem is gone, publishing works, all is well in the world, thanks to everyone who spent time working on this problem with me, i appreciate the help and will make sure to try and help those that i can as was done for me :)